Just something that made me smoke

I actually wanted to say it made me smile, but iPhone autocorrect changed it and I thought it was kinda funny.

In my defense it's nearly 4am

Bored

Well it keeps making me laugh.

Peace out.

Ambivalent feelings lol

Well yesterday was an ambivalent day. Having picked up the first short run of Oxboxes, there are still a few issues that need ironing out, including getting packaging. So anyone who knows a good cardboard box company, please let me know.

Returned home to get the van fixed and although we (I mean Dave really lol) got it to start, the new axle that I bought to replace the half shaft luckily has turned out to be a genuine Bedford CF axle, but the axle actually attached to the van seems to be from another van entirely >.<
Despite these things, I'm going into the day with a kinda benign feeling of optimism. Let's see what the day will bring :)

Good to hear her running again tho :D

Peace and life and love!

Important note to self

Well, working on the plumbing, which I'll get to in a sec, and got ravenously hungry. Being always prepared, there was a Pukka Pie in the freezer, so I lobbed it onto a plate and into the microwave for 4 minutes........


So anyways, turns out none of my van crockery is microwaveable lol. Having melted a rather trippy pattern into one of my small melamine plates, I ate the pie anyway, with a smattering of plate flakes and a fine chianti ( finest hannibal lecter lips smack lol)

So having warmed the audience with an anecdote explicitly displaying to the populace how ignorant I am of melamine properties, I shall move to the next order of business, to whit, my freaking water pump is doing my head in!

For the majority of the time it works perfectly, until some moron lets the water tank run out, although in that moron's defence, I don't have a water level monitor on any of my tanks. So last time the tank fell barren, I filled it back up, and ever since then the water pump makes a horrible noise whenever the taps are turned on. It's a pressure activated pump, and self-primes, but just seems to lock a rattly lil bubble in the diaphragm. Anyone any ideas on how to shift it, I've tried some fairly surreal things which I won't share right now lol. That means I'm open to any and all suggestions :)




Sultan of the Slow Lane

Dream again

I know I haven't posted any of my bizarre dreams for ages, cuz let's face it, the only more boring than people's dreams is people's problems. But this one was a good one. Jun and I were at a seaside town somewhere in Asia where people were continually trying to shoot at me, until they gave up and sent surfing turtles the size of a three bed semi to chase us through the kampung. Then I was knocked out and woke up to be given a job at a bar/workshop where the owners daughter kept swapping from being Asian to being Australian.

Last time I have curry late at night.


Peace out.

Stuff that made me laugh a little

Peace out.

Funniest thing ever

Layna was singing in the bath and refused to stop, even after a fair warning. I dangled this round the corner of the door to warn her:




This didn't seem to work so, I just had to.

Made my day :)

Peace out.

Cow humour

Another homage to the mighty bovine :D



Peace out.

Too cool for school

Been feeling ambivalent about this week, but Saturday is here and it's time to ..... Well, time to do nothing really, as everybody I wanna talk to closes for the weekend.

The weather has simply been a pain in the arse, I think that was the only sunny day for ages :(

Duke Nukem Forever was released yesterday, and I can't justify spending the money on getting a copy for ps3, and I'm totally gutted about it.
If anybody is feeling generous, they can send me tue money for it lol.

Right, I'm off to have a tinker in my van hehe ;)

Peace out

Well that sucked, another injury lol

I have been sat in front of the computer for hours, completing my VAT registration, sorting the figures out on my twelve month P&L forecast, and the occasional funny YouTube film. As I got up to get myself to bed, I discovered that my left leg had gone to sleep so completely that it was utterly numb! I kinda toppled sideways, making a lunge for the bed to break my fall, didn't see my iPad on my black bedsheets. I fell, one hand catching the corner of said iPad, lifting the other corner up in a seesaw effect, and cracked myself straight across the bridge of my nose.

So that's why I'm sat here on the floor, tears streaming from my eyes, nose screaming pain at me, with the left side of me from the waist down completely numb.

Fuck my life lol.


Peace out

Watching Road Wars

Maybe it's just me being a bit thick, but sat watching Road Wars in the early hours of the morning, it frustrates me that people who drive without a valid licence get stopped, caught out, arrested, charged, sent to court, and end up getting a twelve month ban!
WHATS THE FUCKING POINT BANNING SOMEONE WHO ALREADY WAS BANNED AND DIDN'T CARE?
Like most of us, I struggle to keep my car legal, keeping up the extortionate insurance costs, and the paying the three thousand different ways a car is taxed, and it seems that you can just not bother, get the occasional hundred quid fine, and have your licence taken away.
Sign me up, sounds cheaper, and I might get to meet a cute WPC lol.

After that rant and moan, there's a badly recorded advert that made me giggle.

Peace out.

More skittley stuff

Three more attempts

Exploding Molly Moo

Pervert awareness Molly Moo

Running out of gumption

Enjoy :)


Peace out.

My skittles problem

This one?

Or this one?

Peace out.

Goddam funny

Watch and feel free to soil yourselves.

Peace out.

King of kebabs

Watched some huge bloke on tv eating a kebab and moaning about how overweight he was. Couldn't stop thinking about his perfect physique, so just had to have one.


In my defense, I wasn't expecting it to be so big it arrived in it's own pizza box, but by christ, it is tasty.

Two shout outs here, one to Monetts in Eastleigh for supplying this Brobdingnagian feast for the paltry sum of £8.50, including delivery to my door, but also to the Just Eat website, that meant I didn't even have to hear the word 'saladchillisauceplizz'.

Gonna sit down and let the heart attack roll lol.


Peace out.

Hurt

You can be hurt physically every day, it just takes an assshole and a fist. To be hurt emotionally you need a hand around your heart



Peace out.

Pub lunch

Club sandwich, onion rings and a lemonade for a fiver at The Chamberlayne in Eastleigh.



And tastiest sarnie ever :)

Peace out.

Location:Chadwick Rd,Eastleigh,United Kingdom

Test

From where? Lol


Peace out.

I know I've said this a lot .....

But I'm really gonna try to blog at least once a day. Even tho I have precious little to talk about, at least in public :D

Gonna pop in a random pic and a random vid to see if they work







See what happens and watch this space folks.

Peace out.

A good centipede joke

A man goes to the pet shop one day and see's a centipede on offer with a sign above it that says "TALKING CENTIPEDE: £1000". This being an irresistible temptation to him, he stumps up the cash and buys it.

Taking it home he puts it on the table in the box, a few minutes later he decides to test the centipede by saying "... ermm.. you alright mate?, do you wanna go for a pint?" ..... nothing.

Putting it down to nerves he gives it another 10 minutes, goes back to the box and says slightly louder "... You alright mate, fancy going for a pint?"..... again nothing.

Slightly worried now that he's wasted £1000, he leaves it another 10 minutes or so, and returns to the box one final time this time clearing his throat almost to a shout "... You alright mate do you wanna go for a pint!?"

at which the centipede replies : "I heard you the first time, I'm trying to put on my shoes!"

Made me laugh :)

Peace out.

Thinking About Your Axe Wound

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thFjTo6r4gg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

This explains everything lol

This is an excerpt from the following scientifically proven website 100% based in fact.

http://j.mp/hORfuT

Lucky color for Birth date 1,10,19 and 28


For person born on birth date 1,10,19 and 28. The ideal color for them would be Orange, Yellow, and Gold. Since they are ruled by the planet Sun, shades of orange, yellow are the most lucky color for them. These colors attributes to success and energy for 1 born persons. These colors amplifies the nature of number 1, which is bold, courageous, honest, and daring. However, they should avoid colors like black and maroon. These colors will not be fruitful to them in any way.

Best Color: Orange, Yellow, Shades of Yellow, Gold

Worst Color: Black, Maroon


Well that's great, considering my fav colours are black and purple, and I hate orange. At last a legitimate reason, backed up with hard science based fact, for my recent run of bad luck.

Pandas aren't racist

Peace Out

Pissed off turtle

Peace Out

Man the fuck up lol

Peace Out